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You and your spouse divorced, but that doesn’t mean your family did.

It’s likely that you still have family events together. Although they may feel awkward, attending these events can help your kids to know you still support them. Whether it’s a birthday party, school event, or family dinner, it’s important to still make these events a priority.

Don’t put children in a position where they have to invite one parent or the other because you won’t be present at an event with your ex. If you put your children in this position, you may be surprised at who they choose to exclude.

As time passes, things generally become less awkward and more routine for you and your ex to attend the same family events. You may even take a moment to discuss putting your children first and supporting family events with your ex to make sure you are on the same page.

Stay positive and don’t make negative remarks about your ex in front of your children, no matter their age.

If you are at a family event and are meeting new people, you don’t have to introduce the other party as “my ex” or even announce that you are divorced. You can keep it simple and just state they are “Zach’s dad”. Your children deserve to feel loved and supported by both parents, so do your best to make that happen.

Love your children
More than you dislike each other

Remember, you decided to get divorced. Although your children understand the reason, in all reality they would probably rather you were still married. Put your own hard feelings aside and think of the children who have to deal with the ramifications of your decisions. Do your best to lessen the impact of divorce on them.


Ken is the founder of Burton Attorneys at Law and finds the challenge of practicing law extremely rewarding. Although Ken has a broad assortment of experience ranging from bankruptcy to civil litigation to criminal law, Ken’s practice is tailored almost exclusively to the area of family law.

He chose to practice in the family law arena because of the positive and direct impact for good he saw in the lives of his clients.

Having twice been named one of Utah’s Legal Elite by Utah Business Magazine, Ken has a solid reputation as an effective advocate for his clients. He is actively involved in local and state bar associations, serves on various boards of directors and with volunteer organizations, and as a mentor for newly admitted attorneys.

Disclaimer: Using this site or communicating with Burton Family Attorneys through this site does not form an attorney/client relationship. This site is legal advertising only. Do not rely on the information on this website as an alternative to legal advice from your attorney or other professional legal services providers. If you have any specific questions about any legal matter, you should consult your attorney or professional legal services providers.